I can’t help but imagine,
What it would be like
To see you again.
When touching you,
Feels like so long ago.
I’ll never understand, why you treated me so kindly.
Someone like me, why you held me so tenderly.
When I had only hurt you, I could never understand
Even till the end, why you were still so gentle.
So for the past year I’ve been breaking like this,
I’ve been dreaming, wishing and hoping like this.
And now I realise, you finally have me completely,
Just like this.
The sun seeps through the curtains,
They move and slither under the wind
My foot will peek out from the blanket,
The ray will touch my toes.
I will turn to face you,
And my heart will grow.
And though so much time has passed,
I can’t help but want to ask
If I had said yes then,
How different would we be now?
And now we are,
Two very different people
From who we once were.
Hearts that have changed,
Have you grown like I have?
I wish I could have seen it.
People write in different ways.
I write in darkness, shoulders shaking
The sound of me breaking, breaking.
And had I known,
It took pain to write,
I would have gladly hurt,
Without a fight.
I’ve forgotten over time,
What your voice is like,
The way you laugh,
And how you wouldn’t even say my name.
Do you even think of me?
I’ve spent so much time forgetting you
I can’t even remember what we last spoke about
So why did I dream of you last night?
We like so easily –
It makes love so fleeting.
So when we say those three words,
You can’t help but wonder –
But even if we liked that easily,
I want to smile and say,
“In this moment.”
I wouldn’t call it love
So why am I,
Even after all of this time,
I can see her back facing mine,
White like snow, translucent under the moon
The curve of her shaking shoulders
As she sobs into the night.
The break of her voice before it quietens,
The eventual silence before the break of dawn
Silently she’ll stand naked in the dawn of light,
With her back, still facing mine.